Would YOU Date You?

Would YOU Date You?

I've got a question for you that you'll find in my Love Rehab Workbook: Would you date yourself?

No, I'm not out here trying to promote self-love in that "let's all hug it out" way. I mean a real look at who the hell you are in the world of romance.

I used to be a nightmare in relationships—no kidding. Ghosting, stirring the pot just 'cause I was bored, and being an absolute ass not knowing how to communicate my needs. Hell, I was so ridiculous that I'd argue with my ex about letting me split the tab to prove I didn't need anything from him, and then would get mad when I was broke from all the dates. Why? 'Cause, I was sabotaging myself.

But I got therapy, dug deep, and found the root of my issues. You want to get real? Check out the "Traits I Need to Work On" section in my Love Rehab Workbook. What you’ll find there is a also a no-nonsense guide to owning your shit.

Now, let's get into the mind for a sec—cognitive dissonance.

Cognitive dissonance is when your actions don't line up with your beliefs, and it screws with your head. You end up lying to yourself to make the pieces fit. So if you're saying one thing and doing another in your relationship, that's it, you're playing mind games with yourself.

We justify our own mess while calling out others on theirs. It's all about breaking that cycle, people.

For example, if you say you value open communication, but you're ghosting your partner whenever shit hits the fan, that's cognitive dissonance in action. You rationalize it by telling yourself you're too busy or that they'll get over it. But deep down, you know you're being a hypocrite.

This can mess up your relationship. Your partner picks up on your inconsistencies, and trust takes a nosedive. So, if you want to get off this merry-go-round of bullshit, you need to get real with yourself. Check if you're actually walking your talk. If not, time to get your act together.

So, Would You Date You?

Are you brave enough to ask yourself if you'd actually date you? Take a second to marinate in that question. Scary, isn't it? You want others to meet your long list of 'must-haves,' but are you living up to your own standards?

Trigger Questions for Self-Reflection:

  • If you had a dating profile that only you could see, what would it honestly say?
  • What's the one habit you have that you'd hate in a partner?
  • Would you feel secure or anxious if you were dating someone exactly like you?
  • How would you react if your date behaved the way you usually do on dates?
  • Are you a giver, taker, or somewhere in between? Does that align with what you seek in a partner?
  • When was the last time you broke your own dating or relationship 'rules'? Why'd you do it?

Would I Date Myself?

As someone hustling in her career, juggling a clothing brand, and coaching other creatives, I had to ask myself—would I date me? Hell yes, but it took some serious self-reflection to get there.

Finances have always been a touchy subject for me. While I'm out here building an empire, my bank account doesn't always match my ambitions. Did that make me feel unworthy of love? You bet. But I had to pull my head out of my ass and ask, "Is money all I bring to the table?" Hell no. I bring resilience, drive, and the capacity to uplift others. If that's not dateable, what is?

And let's talk about my previous relationships. I'd crave commitment and then get all anxious when someone wanted to get serious. I had to dig deep and realize that my fear stemmed from not feeling secure within myself. I've worked on that. I've evolved. And now, I genuinely feel like I'm the kind of partner I'd want to be with.

Final Thoughts

Understanding my patterns and boosting my self-awareness doesn't just upgrade my love life; it makes me a magnet for meaningful connections in all aspects—family, friendships, even business.

Self-awareness is the sexiest trait I think you can have. Forget the six-pack or the 6-figure salary; show me someone truly awakening to their own bullshit, and I'll show you someone worth my time. Why? Because accountability is rare. When you're willing to call yourself out, you're not just 'relationship material,' you're 'life partner gold.' Own your shit, and watch how you become irresistible not just to others, but even more importantly, to yourself.

So go ahead, put it all on paper. Take that hard look in the mirror. If you can't even admit you'd swipe right on yourself, how the hell do you expect anyone else to? If you're down to get even deeper, check out my Love Rehab Workbook for exercises that cut through the layers of your love life.

It's packed with exercises designed to tear through the bullshit and get to the core of what makes you tick—in relationships and beyond. I made this workbook to make you confront your demons, and maybe even laugh while doing it. 

Until Next Time!


Back to blog

1 Comment

🔥🔥🔥🔥…You’re Amazing Milady

chris picciotto

Leave a comment